The personal blog of a touring Momma

Transfer Day, Tears, and a Rainbow

*The first half of this post is a journal entry written after our first transfer in December of 2016.


Transfer Day

Today was the big day! I arrived at BFC this morning and began the day with pre-transfer acupuncture while listening to my circle and bloom IVF meditation, it was very relaxing. Rodney met me at BFC 10AM and we headed in to speak with Dr. Skinner before the transfer so she could tell us about the quality of our blastocysts and then we headed in a little room to do the deed, well not really, but kind of. The transfer was performed in a small room and there was a teenie window where the embryologists passed the embryos through a tube straight in to my uterus! They said something like “Atkins 2 blastocysts” and then sent them on their way! I guess that’s just one last way of confirming they aren’t sending someone else’s embryos down the tube! Ha! It was a lot like going to an annual “female” exam and didn’t hurt much, just a bit awkward. I shed a few happy tears as the eggs reached my uterus and I saw the little blip on the ultrasound screen like a flash of light. I made Rodney play me The Ali G show on his phone after the transfer because I read an article that said seeing a clown after your transfer can increases IVF success rates, no joke! I laughed and cried some more. Everything went perfectly, now we wait. I’m supposed to wait about 10 days to test. Yeah right!! I want to test today, get me to the nearest Walgreeens STAT!

I stopped journaling after my transfer so I don’t remember every detail of the days that followed but I do remember this because it’s still on my calendar, on December 16th I got a got a positive read on a pregnancy test, it was a Friday. I scheduled a beta (a blood draw to show HCG levels)for the following Monday. I was ecstatic, but still couldn’t really believe it. It was the first positive pregnancy test I had ever seen. Was this finally happening?! Well, yes and…no. When I got the results of my beta they were low-ish, but still showing a pregnancy. By December 22nd, after another beta showing HCG decreasing rapidly rather than rising, we realized I was having a chemical pregnancy or a miscarriage. Whatever ya wanna call it, it sucked. We were so high and then so low. My doctor in Nashville called to tell me the results of my beta, I reported them to Anna at BFC, took a sleeping pill I found in the catacombs of my medicine cabinet and slept the rest of the day away. I was wrecked and Christmas was in three days. In retrospect, I think that was probably bad planning on my part. And so, that is the end of cycle 1, but not the end of our story.

Whatever your story is, we know that all things work together for our good in the end (Romans 8:28). So if it’s not good, it’s not the end!

-Kris Vallotton, Pastor

*spoiler ALERT!
Because it may take me a few days to write my next entry, I have
We went back to BFC in March of 2018 and had a wildly successful frozen embryo transfer. Ryder Falcon Atkins, the light of my life, was born in December of 2017 almost exactly a year after I lost my first pregnancy. I will get in to the details of the FET in my next post.

Sweet Baby Ry, worth all the meds, shots, bruises, and tears in the world!!